The Barrel

2014-04-10 15.55.10

“When one has much to put into them, a day has a hundred pockets.” –Friedrich Nietzsche

Climbing ze stools is a journey worthy of ze view.

Climbing ze stools is a journey worthy of ze view.

Zey say ze world goes round and round and zat we only get one turn on ze wheel. Zen perhaps it is most fortunate zat The Barrel located in ze East Village be a spoke onside zey journey of life.

Traversing alongside Second Avenue one shining afternoon, during my veekly jaunt in search of rare manuscripts and 1950’s German pornography, I find myself filled with an insatiable hunger of another sort. Situationally located below ze triangle at Stuyvesant Street, The Barrel catches my remaining good eye. A step inside quickly divulges ze origin of its name. Ze décor resembles ze inside of a fine European wine barrel, if it was magnified in size twenty times over and adorned by a Sicilian aristocrat. Zis suit’s ze menu quite nicely, as while zey serve both lunch and dinner, ze specialty is ze tapas and wine selection.

I sit down with my fellow expatriate, and study ze menu. Our waiter is a pleasant older fellow, quick to offer suggestions and guidance as we sort thru our choices. Being happy hour we settle on a small feast of tapas. First up is a small bucket of mussels, finely steamed in wine sauce. Not since my time back in ze homeland have I tasted such delight, from something other than your worldly American prostitutes. Next on our table were ze chicken and pork shish kabobs. Zese were, I regret to say, hit and miss. Ze pork kabob was of decent quality and flavor but ze chicken kabob was like my late Russian mistress; flat, dry, and of little meat. Truly though ze highlight of ze meal was ze Patatas Bravas. Tenderly cooked to perfection, with a crisp outside that gives way to soft and warm filling. Lightly seasoned in basil and an aioli chili sauce, fit for an Ubermensch, it remains a staple dish I will be sure to order again and again in future dining’s to come.

Like ze insides of ze human nervous system, the Barrel is lined with liquor.

Like ze insides of ze human tract, the Barrel is lined with liquor.

The Barrel is a welcome establishment for any social situation, whether it be meeting old friends or wooing a lady of ze night. Snide Nietzsche rates it three Dead Gods up!

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